sincere heartbreak [ finn ]

[CECILY BELL]

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Why did she have to go and open her big ugly mouth? Cecily had been cursing herself for days since having left Finn's side with the horrid confession she had left her with. After being pestered and irritated for quite some time about who she was in love with, the young woman had given up to her best friend the secret she had been harbouring for quite a few years. She knew that she never should have expected anything from Finn - for one thing, she had never bothered to ask if she was even bisexual, let alone gay - but that hadn't made it any easier to hear that Finn had a boyfriend. And only finding out because she had been there to witness the pair first hand. Cece had never meant to fall in love with Finn. The girl had been part of her life for so long, it had just happened. Cecily had always been such a homebody, never keen to go out and about, always wanting to stay in, that the magician had been one of her only non-familial friends as a child. It was only natural that in the end, the person she had wanted to be with was the one she had known so intimately for so long. Love was such a strong word too. Cecily was frustrated that she could even think about loving Finn without having the feelings returned, but it didn't make it any less true. She had well and truly fallen into the dark abyss of unrequited love. Orange hair was curled awkwardly around her fingers as she shuffled forward, and she used her other hand to push her glasses up her nose. She had ventured out of her comfort zone with Umber and Esper at her heels, in order to apologise to her lifelong friend. The only place she knew Finn may be was at a contest hall, since they had not corresponded since the sudden confession - then - bolt situation they had both been shoved into. She was nervous. What if Finn refused to see her? What if her lifelong friend wouldn't allow her to be her friend any more? As much as the thought of being unloved by the person she cared about hurt, Cece was more afraid of the possibilities that may lie in wait for her. She wanted Finn to forgive her, to tell her she was being silly to fall in love - Cece agreed, after all - and that everything was fine. But there was every chance that Finn might not forgive her. Might be frustrated that all the sleepovers and chatting might have meant more. Of course, Cecily had never thought of it in the past. Realising her feelings for her lifelong friend had been a recent discovery, and she had to congratulate herself for being so long to have been interested. Cece wasn't a creeper. She didn't think about Finn naked, or about the sexual side of the not-to-happen relationship. The main reason she cared about the quirky, naughty girl was her ability to make her smile and laugh. To make her feel normal. Without Finn, she was just a basket case Eevee trainer who no one loved. Making a silent vow to herself that if Finn rejected her offer of friendship, she would go back to Ecruteak and never leave, write her books from the town and find a way to make a living off that. She closed in on the door to the contest hall, hearing the dull roar as a winner was announced from inside. Now she just had to wait and see if Finn came out. Hoenn was too big. Slateport was huge. She was braving the city just to see if she could make amends. If not, well, she would have to figure something out.

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TAGGED: finn, nick&nate? WORDS: 640 NOTES: she needed more posts, lol. .

[FINN FINNIGAN]

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[/color][/font] felt good to win for once, Finn thought to herself as she beamed proudly at the applauding audience. Admittedly, none of her main rivals were there, no Azumi, no Bunny, definitely no Ruby to beat the pants off her and Quil again. Not that she was wearing pants int he first place. And certainly no Quil, her biggest rival of the lot. It was a bit disappointing to win without being able to tease him or any of them about it later, but the sound of the applause, the thrill of victory, it was all too much to let anything else get her down for once. After all, her little Heart had just won the Hyper Rank for Cuteness, it should be a time to celebrate.

As the other challengers packed up to go, and the audience filing out of their seats and back into the lobby, Finn looked down at her little Eevee and smiled, albeit a bit sadly. Things had been going a lot better lately. She and Nate were back together after a fight that she was scared was going to end them for good, Dami was out of prison and no worse for the wear, she was back to winning contests...it was just a few loose ends left, and her little Heart just reminded her of the biggest one.

Her oldest and one of her best friends had confessed her love, but only after Finn had sat there, teasing her and what now sounded like threatening her with kisses with Nate. She hadn't realized at the time what she was doing but she'd felt bad ever since. Cecily was one of the few people she actually cared about, the ones whose feelings actually made an impact on Finn's mood and actions. She hadn't wanted to hurt the blond girl, not like that, and unlike the situation with Nate, she wasn't sure how to apologize.

It had been her fault, that was the one thing she knew. If she hadn't pried and pleaded and teased to get her to tell who she was crushing on, the huge split would never have happened. It wouldn't have happened and Finn would have still had her to be with when she and Nate had broken up and Dami was arrested and she really was left all alone. That experience had been miserable, but she knew now that she couldn't let the important people in her life be taken away again. She had the twins back, and Dami too, and Lilly was somewhere out there, but Cecily...

She wasn't even sure if the girl wanted to see her ever again.

So with a few words of praise and a soft smile, Finn called back her youngest teammate and left the now empty stage and auditorium. Once she hit the lobby, she looked around, wondering if maybe, for once, one of her boys had accepted her invitation to come watch her perform. Dami had promised, after all, and apparently Nate had been stalkingkeeping an eye on her, so there was always the chance. She didn't expect to see the pretty pair of green eyes waiting over near the door, not since she fully expected the girl to be back home in Ecruteak. And Finn froze, staring at her with wide blue eyes. Cece was here? Had she actually come to see her? Maybe things would be able to be worked out after all, the magician thought, offering a small smile and wave as a greeting, though not moving from her spot on the far side of the room.[/div]
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[CECILY BELL]

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Cece didn't know what to think about the whole situation any more. She knew she had to apologise and then try to pretend that nothing ever happened. If there was one thing that the young woman didn't want, it was to be ignored by her only "real" friend for the rest of her life. She was too shy to put herself out there, and she had known Finn so long that the thought of never speaking again- she meeped to herself as she fiddled with the edge of her shirt. Worry spread further through her mind, and she wondered if this was a good idea. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. Either way, this would decide the fate of their friendship. Cecily wondered if she should have watched the contest for a change. Most of the time she watched the contests on television, to see how her friend was doing, but that wasn't as personal as watching it well.. in person. Twiddling her thumbs whilst waiting was a nightmare, but she had no choice. She had to brave up, and force herself to wait patiently, otherwise she and Finn might never speak again, or never even see one another. It was with shock that she spied Finn's face, one of the last out from the doors where the coordinators prepared. She adjusted her glasses nervously, feeling her body tense against the wall. With every moment she felt more like this was a bad idea, especially when her friend stopped quite a ways away. Cecily was not a brave girl. Many things frightened her. And pushing herself away from the wall in order to make her way forwards, in the direction of the coordinator was one of the most frightening things she'd ever done. Her hands trembled as she lowered her eyes, tripping a little as she made her way closer. Her heart was caught in her throat, and she felt as if nothing was right. She should run away. Run away and never come back. Leave Finn's life forever, and just let her have all the other amazing people stay with her. She almost bolted but her heart kept her firmly in place. Cecily bit her lip as the final few steps brought her close enough that Finn would be able to hear her generally meek voice, but still far enough away that Cecily couldn't dare hope to hug her, or get close enough to feel the pain of longing. No, she couldn't let Finn know there was longing. She attempted to smile, although it looked wrong. Wonky. Instead, she let her face fall into one of apology, then looked directly at her own, turned in feet. Why was she so awkward all the time? "I.. I'm sorry I did so m-many stupid things, Finn. I was being silly. It's f-fine. I shouldn't have ever even thought to mention it. It's just.. s-silliness." She attempted another awkward smile up at the girl, but quickly looked down at her feet again. Miserable. She was even a failure at apologising. Once more her hands clasped in front of her, awkawrdly twiddling in an almost offensive attempt to keep herself from running away crying the way she had on a previous occassion. Cecily couldn't help her feelings of misworth, however, and she just hoped that Finn would accept her awful, terrible apology. Why would a girl like Finn even want to be friends with her anyways? She was boring, she had no confidence and she was simply plain.

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TAGGED: finn, a little open? WORDS: 585 NOTES: this post was ridiculously easy to write. o.o I guess feeling similarly helps. .