CRAZY BEAUTIFUL LIFE. [ ali ]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellspacing,10,true][atrb=style, background: url(http://i.imgur.com/zeDfD.jpg); padding: 10px, bTable][style=background-color: #494949; padding: 10px; width: 310px; font: 20px georgia; color: #f9f9f9; font-size: 8.5px; text-align: right;]Alana Evelyn Lucey We found love in a hopeless place.[/style] [style=background: url(http://i.imgur.com/UQHxG.jpg); width: 310px; padding: 10px;] [/style]

[atrb=style, background: url(http://i.imgur.com/UQHxG.jpg); padding: 10px; font: 12px comic sans; width: 310px;][style=text-shadow: #9f9f9f 1px 1px 0px; font: 13px comic sans; color: #343434; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center;]in progress ○ | discontinued ✖ | complete ✔[/style][style=text-shadow: #9f9f9f 1px 1px 0px; font: 9px comic sans; font-style: smallcaps; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center;]REBEL | TRAINER | BREEDER | RESEARCHER | COORDINATOR[/style]

[atrb=style, background: url(http://i.imgur.com/UQHxG.jpg); padding: 10px; font: 12px comic sans; color: #494949; width: 310px;][style=float: left; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/zeDfD.jpg); padding: 8px; width: 100px; height: 100px;][/style] [style=text-indent: 5px; text-shadow: #9f9f9f 1px 1px 0px; font: 15px comic sans; color: #494949; text-transform: uppercase;]❧ ALL FADE AWAY ○[/style][style=text-indent: 20px; font-size: 11px;]On-going[/style][style=text-indent: 20px; font-size: 11px;]Olivine City, Johto[/style][style=text-indent: 20px; font-size: 11px;]Nick & Nate Finnigan[/style][style=text-indent: 20px; font-size: 11px;]Beach day with the twins.[/style] [style=float: right; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/zeDfD.jpg); padding: 8px; width: 100px; height: 100px; margin-left: 5px;][/style] [style=text-align: right; text-shadow: #9f9f9f 1px 1px 0px; font: 15px comic sans; color: #494949; text-transform: uppercase;]❧ thread title ○ [/style][style=text-align: right; font-size: 11px;]status[/style][style=text-align: right; font-size: 11px;]location[/style][style=text-align: right; font-size: 11px;]participants [/style][style=text-align: right; font-size: 11px;]a one-liner about the thread here [/style]

[style=font: 9px courier new; text-align: center; margin-top: -10px;]♥ lucie from love-stamp[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=cellspacing, 5, true][atrb=cellpadding, 5, true][atrb=width, 400, true][atrb=style, background: url(http://i50.tinypic.com/f3i8bc.jpg); width: 95px;]	[atrb=style, background: url(http://i50.tinypic.com/f3i8bc.jpg);][style=background: #f1f4eb; color: #6d6d6d; padding: 5px; font-size: 10px; text-align: justify; line-height: 11px;]Ali got her Salamence when he was just a Bagon. She worked with him to make him strong enough for her to be confident in her battling abilities. The two are rather close and Ali doesn't like have any other Pokemon with her but Salamence. They have been through a lot to get where they are today and Salamence would rather sacrifice himself than see his beloved Ali get hurt. He is pretty protective over his trainer and doesn't trust anyone but her, leading him to be mean to anyone who goes near her. Known Moves; Fly, Ember, Protect, Zen Headbutt, Hyper Beam, Earthquake, Shadow Claw, & Flamethrower.[/style]
[atrb=style, background: url(http://i50.tinypic.com/f3i8bc.jpg); width: 95px;][rs=2]	[atrb=style, background: url(http://i50.tinypic.com/f3i8bc.jpg);][style=background: #f1f4eb; color: #6d6d6d; padding: 5px; font-size: 10px; text-align: justify; line-height: 11px; text-align: center;]No PC Pokemon.[/style]
[atrb=style, background: url(http://i50.tinypic.com/f3i8bc.jpg);][style=background: #f1f4eb; color: #6d6d6d; padding: 5px; font-size: 10px; text-align: justify; line-height: 11px; text-align: center;] [/style]
[cs=2][atrb=style, padding: 0px;] template made by rinne of ote.

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,width: 140px; height: 40px;][bg=1a1a1a]	[atrb=style,width: 120px; height: 40px;][bg=1a1a1a][style=font-family: arial; line-height: 16px; font-size: 10px; text-align: left; padding-left: 4px; margin: 4px; background-color: f0f0f0; width: 110px; color: 333333;]SEARCH[/style]	[atrb=style,width: 40px; height: 40px;][bg=1a1a1a][style=font-family: arial; font-size: 14px; line-height: 90%; text-align: center; color: f0f0f0; padding-top: 12px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 5px; background-color: 010101;]Home[/style]	[atrb=style,width: 40px; height: 40px;][bg=1a1a1a][style=font-family: arial; font-size: 14px; line-height: 90%; text-align: center; color: f0f0f0; padding: 4px;]Profile[/style]	[atrb=style,width: 40px; height: 40px;][bg=1a1a1a][style=font-family: arial; font-size: 14px; line-height: 90%; text-align: center; color: f0f0f0; padding: 4px;]Messages[/style]
[atrb=style, width: 155px; height: 155px; background-color: f0f0f0; padding: 4px;][style=background-image: url('http://i.imgur.com/s8nuU.png'); width: 150px; height: 150px; border-radius: 150px;] [/style]	[th][atrb=vAlign,top][atrb=style,background-color: f0f0f0; padding: 4px;][style=font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 22px; color: 010101;text-align: left; padding-left: 4px;]Alana Lucey[/style][style=font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 18px; color:cb4646; padding-left: 4px; text-align: left; margin-top: -8px;]@missalana Blackthorn City[/style][style=font-family: georgia; font-size: 11px; padding-left: 4px; text-align: left; font-style: italic; margin-top: -3px; color: 010101;]We found love in a hopeless place.[/style][style=font-family: verdana; font-size: 9px; color:cb4646; margin-top: -3px; text-align: left; padding-left: 4px; margin-bottom: 5px;]http://twitter.com/MissAlana[/style][style=font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 20px; color: 010101;text-align: left; padding-left: 4px;]What's Happening?[/style][style=margin-left: 4px; background-color: ffffff; color: 010101; text-align: left; text-decoration: blink; height: 45px;]|[/style]

[style=font-family: verdana; font-size:7px; text=transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,width: 110px; padding: 4px; background-color: f0f0f0; border-top: 1px solid #cccccc; border-bottom: 1px solid #cccccc; border-left: 1px solid #cccccc;][style=background-color: c0c0c0; padding: 5px; width: 100px; height: 100px;][/style]

[atrb=style,width: 340px; padding: 4px; background-color: f0f0f0; border-top: 1px solid #cccccc; border-bottom: 1px solid #cccccc; border-right: 1px solid #cccccc;][style=font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 18px; color:cb4646; padding-left: 4px; text-align: left; margin-top: -8px;]MissAlana[/style][style=font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 16px; color: 010101;text-align: left; padding-left: 4px;]Nothing like hot chocolate to warm a girl up~[/style][style=font-family: verdana; font-size: 9px; color:010101; margin-top: -3px; text-align: left; padding-left: 4px; margin-bottom: 5px;]2 minutes ago[/style]

[style=font-family: verdana; font-size:7px; text=transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

Here are all the letters Ali writes to her mom.
Yes, Nikki knows they suck, but oh well.
Enjoy.

[/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote][/center]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,4,true][atrb=valign,top,true][atrb=style, width: 250px; background-color:EAEAEA; padding: 5px; border: 10px solid #c1c1c1;][style=background-color: 333333; padding: 4px; float: right;][/style][style=width:129px; background-color:333333; font-size:18px; color:white; padding:5px; line-height:113%; text-transform:uppercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]ALANA LUCEY[/style][style=width:125px; padding:5px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec;font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:2px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]✓ follow me [/style][style=width:119px; padding:1px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec; font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:5px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 5px;]➟ visit profile[/style] [style=text-align:justify; font-family:georgia; font-size:9px; line-height:95%; color:333333; padding:0px 0px 3px 5px; border-left:30px solid #333333;]Dear Mom, Writing to you like this makes me miss you. I haven't had a lot of time to write, but today, I'm going to make up for it. So much has happened to me since I last wrote, Mom. I guess I should start off with the fact that I got a boyfriend. He's great. You'd really love him if you could meet him. A lot has happened with us, though, and right now, we're not together. I... I really wish we were, but he needs to think some things through and I guess everything happens for a reason, right? Everything was just hurting. We argued a lot and were rarely happy with each other. I didn't get how two people could love each other so much, but manage to somehow argue about everything. I guess it was just an unhealthy relationship that needed to end, no matter how many times I try to convince myself that it shouldn't have ended. I won't even try to convince myself that I don't miss him, though. He was easily the guy I thought I'd grow old with, the guy who I'd have kids with. It's funny how things change, huh? One of the things that managed to cause most of the hurt in our relationship was the fact that we were going to have a baby. Yes, Mom, I was pregnant. That didn't exactly work out, though. He started warming up to the idea of having kids with me and I had lost it a month later. We were both pretty devastated, but he always thought that it was his fault I had lost the baby. It was really just my body rejecting the pregnancy, but we just weren't prepared for the loss. It was just so... sudden. I... Take good care of the baby, Mom. I'm sure it's safe with you. Sometimes I wonder what life would've been like if the miscarriage wouldn't have happened. Would we still be together with our little son or daughter? What would we even name it? There's just so many questions and it's sad that they weren't answered. Hopefully they'll be answered eventually... Mom, do you think I'm getting my hopes up? I keep thinking that this break up is only temporary, that we'll be back together in no time. Am I foolish for thinking that? I just... I really don't want to realize that maybe this is it, that Nick and I are actually done. If I realize that, then I might as well go find Damion so he can end all the pain, because it hurts to know that Nick and I are over... I don't want to resort to suicide or begging to be killed, but it already feels like I've died. At least, sometimes it does. I don't know what made me think that nothing's worth it anymore, but I feel as though sometimes, there's just no reason in living anymore. It's a horrible feeling but I don't know how to stop it. I don't know how to make the pain go away. I really, really wish I did, but I don't and it's only making the pain linger. I just want the pain to stop, Mom. I don't want to go through this anymore. Haru thinks I should just fake my happiness to show that I'm strong enough to get through this, but I'm not strong enough. I couldn't even cope with your death and this? I can't handle it. How did you cope with everything, Mom? You were always so strong, so comforting. I wish I knew how to be the same way. The only thing that helps anymore is writing to you. Maybe I should write to the baby too? That might help me handle losing it, but I have no idea how to handle the break up. I don't think I could write to Nick and I doubt he'd let me have some snuggles. -sighs- I just don't know anymore, Mom. I wish you were here to give me some advice, but I guess I'm going to have to figure this out on my own. It's going to be hard, though. I'm expected to just be Nick's friend and pretend like everything is going to be fine, but it's so hard to turn love into friendship... I'll write again soon. I love you, Mom. [/style]

[style=font-family: arial; font-size: 8px; text-transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,4,true][atrb=valign,top,true][atrb=style, width: 250px; background-color:EAEAEA; padding: 5px; border: 10px solid #c1c1c1;][style=background-color: 333333; padding: 4px; float: right;][/style][style=width:129px; background-color:333333; font-size:18px; color:white; padding:5px; line-height:113%; text-transform:uppercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]ALANA LUCEY[/style][style=width:125px; padding:5px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec;font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:2px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]✓ follow me [/style][style=width:119px; padding:1px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec; font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:5px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 5px;]➟ visit profile[/style] [style=text-align:justify; font-family:georgia; font-size:9px; line-height:95%; color:333333; padding:0px 0px 3px 5px; border-left:30px solid #333333;]Dear Mom, I... Happy birthday. You know, it's pretty miserable living without you. I miss you more than you could ever know and... I just wish I could give you another hug. Your hugs were always the best. They comforted me when I was feeling low and I miss them. Maybe... Maybe I'll be able to come home to you soon, Mom. I'm sorry I haven't visited you lately. I've been trying, but I just can't bring myself to actually visit the cemetery. I guess I'm just not ready to go alone yet. The last time I visited your grave, I had Noelle and Leighton by my side. Even Reyahn was there, but now... I'm alone. I just don't know if I can be alone with just your grave and I. I mean... It's hard knowing that when I'm at your grave, you're not there to hold my hand and tell me that everything is going to be all right. I guess no one can really comfort me like you can, Mom. You just had this soothing quality to you that I just miss. I don't think I've ever missed anyone as much as I miss you right now, Mom. I just... I need my Mom more than ever. I think I'm going to spend most of my day at your grave today. Alone or not, I'm going to spend your birthday with you. I'll even tell you about what I've been up to lately, ok? I just... I really want to be with you, Mom. I'd bring some of my friends along, but Eden's been rather busy lately, Haru's missing, and I don't think the twins would stay for very long. That's ok, though. It'll be a mother-daughter day for the two of us. It's about time for me to make some breakfast so I should probably go. I love you, Mom, and I hope you have an awesome birthday. I'll be there soon! [/style]

[style=font-family: arial; font-size: 8px; text-transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,4,true][atrb=valign,top,true][atrb=style, width: 250px; background-color:EAEAEA; padding: 5px; border: 10px solid #c1c1c1;][style=background-color: 333333; padding: 4px; float: right;][/style][style=width:129px; background-color:333333; font-size:18px; color:white; padding:5px; line-height:113%; text-transform:uppercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]ALANA LUCEY[/style][style=width:125px; padding:5px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec;font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:2px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]✓ follow me [/style][style=width:119px; padding:1px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec; font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:5px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 5px;]➟ visit profile[/style] [style=text-align:justify; font-family:georgia; font-size:9px; line-height:95%; color:333333; padding:0px 0px 3px 5px; border-left:30px solid #333333;]Dear Mom, Hey. I'm trying to hold on, I really am. Sometimes, everything just becomes so much to handle and you just want to curl up and try to cry it all away. I've been feeling like that this whole week. Maybe next week will be better? God, I hope so. This week just sucked majorly. I've probably cried at least once every day. I guess I'm not as strong as I used to be, huh? Normally, I could just brush it off and say I'm fine, but the emotions are just too much. Maybe I'll try finding some kind of song to sing to try to get my mind off of everything? I'm really a horrible singer, though. ^^; I... I'm sorry this letter is a bit unexpected. I was feeling pretty low after my talk with my friend Vincent and I just had to write. Oh, and sorry for the tear stains. They're not that easy to cover up... Anyway, writing to you helps in a way. I feel like I can tell you all of my secrets and my feelings and it'll just stay between us. No one else has to know what I write in these letters. This one will be on its way to you by tomorrow, I promise. I'll even hand deliver it myself. I'll see you soon, Mom. I love you. [/style]

[style=font-family: arial; font-size: 8px; text-transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

[ALANA LUCEY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,4,true][atrb=valign,top,true][atrb=style, width: 250px; background-color:EAEAEA; padding: 5px; border: 10px solid #c1c1c1;][style=background-color: 333333; padding: 4px; float: right;][/style][style=width:129px; background-color:333333; font-size:18px; color:white; padding:5px; line-height:113%; text-transform:uppercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]ALANA LUCEY[/style][style=width:125px; padding:5px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec;font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:2px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 6px;]✓ follow me [/style][style=width:119px; padding:1px; border:5px solid #333333; background-color:ececec; font-size:14px; color:333333; padding:5px; line-height:100%; text-transform:lowercase; text-align:center; font-family:yanone kaffeesatz; margin-bottom: 5px;]➟ visit profile[/style] [style=text-align:justify; font-family:georgia; font-size:9px; line-height:95%; color:333333; padding:0px 0px 3px 5px; border-left:30px solid #333333;]Dear Mom, Hey... Sorry I haven't written in a while. Things have been pretty busy lately. I... I guess I have to bring you up to speed, huh? Better get started then. First off, I've somehow gotten even more hostile than I was before. I know, it's bizarre. Now I seem to get into more fights than ever. Maybe I'm just taking out all the pain and suffering that I've experienced on others just to feel something else besides those negative feelings. Or maybe I like the adrenaline rush that I seem to get from fighting. Either way, I don't think it's good for me. I... The trips to the hospital have been more frequent and I have tons of bruises. That should probably be a sign to stop all this fighting that I've been doing, but then I'd just be in the same boat as before. I'd be stuck in this rut that just isn't healthy. I feel as though I'd be a coward for running away, throwing away everything just to retreat when things get tough, but maybe it's the only solution. I'm not saying that running away will solve anything, but... It might be the only way I can get away from these feelings, this suffering. It's not ok to feel this way, Mom. It's horrible. It's agonizing, especially when I'm alone. When Vin's around, it's not so bad because he makes it go away, even if it's only for a little while. No one can really make it go away, though... I suppose it's just because I'm not one to really talk about it. When things get emotional, I retreat behind my walls so I can't get hurt. At least, I feel like I do. Feelings aren't something I can express easily. Maybe it's because I think that maybe everyone is judging me if I express how I really feel? With Vin, it's easy because he understands. He understands all the pain and suffering that I've experienced and he comforts me. I... No one has really been able to do that. At least, not in the way he has... You know, they say that true strength isn't measured by how strong your punches are or how much weight you can lift, but by how many challenges you've overcome. Does that mean I'm strong? Probably not, but I'd like to believe that I've overcome a few challenges that made me stronger. Maybe if I felt stronger, then I'd have the courage to tell others that I'm not ok when they ask instead of faking a smile and pretending like I'm not falling apart at the seams. I... Alaska once said that the labyrinth isn't life or death, it's only suffering. You probably don't know who Alaska is, but she's right. I believe that I'm stuck in this labyrinth, stuck waiting for someone, anyone, to rescue me from all the suffering. Guess I'll be waiting forever then, huh? [/style]

[style=font-family: arial; font-size: 8px; text-transform: uppercase;]CODED BY TSU DOLL OF LOVE STAMP.[/style]

referencing to looking for alaska like a baws :3
l-lol anyway, enjoy? ^^;